Soft power can be a valuable tool, we should use it more often - Daxa Patel

Recently, a Labour MP was suspended for making a remark, which has to be said, was totally inappropriate, about another MP in the Conservative Party.

Quite possibly, it is not in their nature to be cruel about another human, but in haste, they not only made a cruel comment, but they went further before offering an apology. The apology at best, was almost a grudging admission of having had their hand slapped in public, but you could tell it was lacking in sincerity.

Much has been mentioned about our late Queen’s soft power and leadership skills, and it got me thinking how this applies in all aspects of our life no matter where we are and with whom. It applies in business as well as in our personal world.

Last year I had the good fortune to welcome a dog into my world.Like most dog owners, I will say my dog is no ordinary dog. I was raised with a German Shepherd as my dad had one when I was about three years old. However, owning one is a different thing altogether.

So, what has this got to do with ‘soft power’ you may well wonder. I would say everything.

To get a dog to be well-behaved you have to give the dog, respect and agency to make the right choice. My dog, Oscar, has a lovely temperament. But there is always the danger of him taking me out for a walk rather than me taking him for a walk. To be honest, we are both still learning as we go along.

One of the first things drummed into me by those wonderful trainers at the Yorkshire German Shepherd Training Centre in Calverley was the importance of loose lead walking.

Mutual respect even when we don't share the same language. A tight lead takes away his agency and shows my fear and it shows my lack of trust and respect towards him.

He, in return, shows enormous respect towards me. Now, we don’t share the same language, but we can still communicate, so why should this be any different for us humans when we engage with others.

This may be a simplistic example between two different species, but it also applies to getting the best out of us when dealing with our own species.

If a point needs to be made why not do it nicely? I mean haven’t we learnt anything from the horrors of the pandemic which affected us all and brought us down on our knees? Hopefully, yes.

It does not make for a harmonious world when we speak ill of others and hurt them either through our words or actions.

Her late Majesty had a massive impact not through aggression, but through her understated wisdom and tact. She was a global leader, not just our head of state.

When President Macron of France, paid his tribute he said she was our Queen, but she was the Queen. I can’t think of another leader who is respected in this way. She was a class act when it comes to soft power, and why can’t we show our gratitude to her, by learning to use our soft power even more than we would like to, towards our fellow beings.

To conclude, by letting people be and then winning their trust to influence subtle change is like the loose lead analogy, it may take time to work but it does have an impact in the long run.

Daxa Manhar Patel is a solicitor, author and executive coach.